Give and it will come back to you… I’ve been reflecting a lot recently on this principle. Giving not only refers to material things. You can give your time, skill set or resources of any kind. I’m the type of person who gives a lot, whatever I’m able to at a specific time. Be it my time, skills or any available resources I may have in that moment. But I always felt like the balance between giving and receiving was off for me personally. I love to help in any way I can, that’s just my nature, but I got to a point where I felt as if I gave so much of me but never received enough in return for my value. I’m not saying that I don’t receive anything at all, that’s not the case. I’m not just talking about money either, but I will not discount it’s necessity or value. Receiving could look different depending on the specific scenario or situation. It could mean being returned a favour or being recognized for the value you carry and be respected and appreciated accordingly. Over time, constantly giving without receiving can leave you feeling drained resulting in frustration and even resentment.
Are you always giving and not use to receiving enough or even at all? If you answered yes, I totally understand. I know it often feels that way. One thing I have come to learn however, is that the people, places and things we give to are not necessarily where we receive our blessings from in return. I know… it’s hard to view things from that perspective when you’re tired and frustrated. Especially from constantly giving to the same source without receiving anything from that specific source. The thing to remember is that we usually do not receive our blessings from the same places we invest in. We have to keep our eyes open for unexpected blessings from unexpected sources. Blessings do not always come in the ways we want them to or think they will.
I’ve had many seasons in my life where I just wanted to be paid for all the time and skills I invested into helping others build their vision. It is very easy to become bitter, especially if you have a vision of your own which has not physically manifested simply because you can’t afford it yet. But when I actually took a step back to look at the big picture, I could never say that I lacked or was in need of anything. I had everything to my comfort. I may not have had everything I wanted but I had everything I needed. That itself was a blessing.
Something that I always found interesting was the fact that there are times when I could get what I want by just asking, but it just feels better to work hard, earn my own money and buy what I wanted myself. I can laugh now thinking about this because this is a perfect example to illustrate that our blessings do not always come the way we want them to or think they will. It feels good when I get paid for my hard work, but for some reason, receiving from someone what I actually planned to get for myself just does not feel as fulfilling… Is it just me? Lol, maybe. I guess it’s natural to desire independence… But how many blessings have we missed chasing independence and turning a blind eye to all the good things God has placed in front of and around us? Just because it’s not packaged and delivered the way we wanted it.
In all our giving, it’s important to constantly check our motive. Why do you give your time and resources? Are you doing it to receive something in return? Or is it coming from an authentic place? A good way to check is to ask yourself, if I never receive anything in return, would I be willing to do this indefinitely? Now… before I move on, please hear me out… Do not confuse this with being taken advantage of, that’s a totally different story and I certainly would not tolerate that. We need to use wisdom so that our kindness is not abused, but in this case that is not what I’m referring to. What I mean is doing something you are appreciated for but you receive nothing tangible in return. This could be buying groceries for an elderly neighbour for a month while her daughter is away for work, just because she can’t and genuinely needs help. You aren’t being monetarily paid to do it but you are constantly paid with sincere gratitude and showered with appreciation.
If you’re a giver, it’s not uncommon to suffer from the need to return the favour to every person who does something for you and vice versa. I know because I’m a recovering “over-giver” (I think I just made that up 🤷 lol). It was like playing tag. If someone bought me a birthday gift, I automatically felt like I needed to return the favour because it might look bad if I didn’t. Trying to one-up someone all the time is tiring and frankly unnecessary. The root of that is toxic! Be okay with receiving and not thinking about what you need to give in return. Don’t make the mistake of thinking you are not appreciative enough if you don’t give something in return. You give all the time! Simply express your gratitude and say thank you. Learn to receive without guilt.
The giver’s blessings come back in different ways and through different people. Yes, you may receive a gift from me. But if we look at the principle of giving, there’s no rule that you should receive from the same person you gave to. The principle is simply to give and you will receive blessings in return. It didn’t specify from who, what, where or when. But you will receive. Don’t put a limit on it. Continue giving from a pure place and be open to receive from wherever, however and whenever your blessings may come.
Love & Blessings,
Click here to listen to the audio version of this post.